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A Mad Lib

July 29, 2011

A Mad Lib

[Number] Years ago in the land of [Proper noun] was the kingdom of [Proper Noun].  This kingdom was ruled by the High King [Proper noun—Male].  Aiding him were a group of priestesses who were sworn to worship the goddess [Proper noun—Female].  The goddess granted her priestesses the ability to use her magic to help the kingdom grow and prosper.

But some men grew angry and jealous with the priestesses because of their power.  They created their own god [Proper noun—Male], who they claimed was the true god.  The priests went all over the kingdom, preaching that the priestesses were in fact heretics, witches who kept the land slaves to their own desires.

Over time, and using some well-timed disasters, the priests gain converts.  They built their own temples of worship so they could become even stronger.  The priestesses ignored this new religion and tried to continue their work.

But they started to receive more and more animosity among the people.  Then the old king died and his son [Proper name—Male] took the throne.  This new king was a follower of the new god, though he promised to respect both.

This was of course a lie.  With the urging of his advisors, the king ordered troops to seek out the priestesses and slay them.  In the town of [Proper name] there was a great ambush, with dozens of the priestesses ambushed and killed.

After this reign of terror, the old temples to the goddess were torn down or rededicated to the new god.  Her followers were forced to convert or be killed.  As for the priestesses, a few escaped the purge to seek refuge in the wilds.

The priestesses who remained were branded as witches, heretics of the new religion.  They were ordered to be killed on sight.  But not everyone embraced the new religion, so the witches found a niche in providing potions and such.  They were also sought out if monsters like dragons or vampires terrorized a village.

The priestesses sought to retain their old traditions and rituals, but over time some were lost.  Lost as well was the true magic, the power of their goddess.  There are some who think it’s lost forever, but others believe in time, the goddess will favor them again…


This probably sounds a lot like what happened to the Jedi in the Star Wars prequels, right?  But there are also historical examples like the Knights Templar, the ancient Greek/Roman gods vs. Christianity, the Egyptian gods, and Christianity vs. Druids in England.

Anyway, want to take a stab at filling in some of these holes?  Try to keep it clean, though.  We’re not playing Porno Mad Libs, much as I might want to.


From → Uncategorized

  1. Instead of murdering the priestesses I think it should be rape. No use letting all those doomed priestesses go to waste if you are a lying deceitful man in this world.

    • Yeah, but we’re going to try to keep this PG-13.

      • It’s funny how rape which is less of a capital crime than murder even by the laws of our own country is somehow rated-R but murder isn’t. It’s like that old argument I had with someone about how nudity which happens everyday (we see ourselves naked) or anything sexual is intolerable for us to show our children…yet we can bombard them with violence, decapitations, etc. which is a completely unnatural act.

      • That’s why the whole movie rating system is out of whack. A movie like Transformers 3 that’s non-stop violence gets a PG-13 rating but a drama like The King’s Speech gets an R rating because it might have an F-word and some nudity. Our society says “Violence is OK but sex is ICKY!!!” Like we’re all a bunch of third graders.

  2. Ok:

    7.3; Twinkie; Ding-Dong; Dark Chocolate; Nougat; Nutella; Snickers; Fluff.

    As you can tell, I’ve had a rough day. 😉

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